Your trauma is not your fault. Period.
You are not identified by your trauma, it isn't who you are, it's just a part of you and your journey.
Whether you have suffered emotional or physical abuse throughout your life, whether you had sad or painful experiences throughout your journey, trauma can shape you in many ways in which, most of times, the person is unaware. Sometimes we try to bury our feelings or smooth the impact that certain events had in our life but that impact remains whether we want it or not.
Trauma can have the power to destroy us and it can also have the power to transform us. It can affect our habits and outlook on life, leading to addictions and poor decision-making or it can give us the power to transform ourselves to be and do better.
We are not our trauma but we have to live with it, every f*cking day.
Somedays can be peaceful while others can be really hard to get through.
We can find us blaming ourselves for our suffering and struggling with feelings of guilt and shame but listen:
It's truly not your fault that you were hurt, neglected, abused, projected onto or you had to experience some heavy stuff in your life!
It's unfair that you had to go through something like this but you should know that even if your trauma is yours, you are not alone.
It's unfair because you had no choice and now you have to deal with the consequences but know that you are so much more than your pain, you are so much more than what happenned to you!
Say it again: I am so much more!.
You are not responsible for the unfortunate events that happenned in your life;
You are not responsible for other people's mistakes;
You are not responsible for the actions of those who've hurt you;
You are not responsible for the environment you grew up in;
You are not responsible for other people's wounds.
Trauma is NEVER the result of weakness. Even if it "could have been avoided", even if other people have "experienced worse", even if "it happened a long time ago", even if "no one knows" - your trauma is real, valid, your pain matters, your experiences matter and your healing matters.
All our feelings and responses to our trauma are valid and that's more than okay! Recovery from trauma is an individual process and will look different for everyone.
We don't know the real impact we have on each other, so be kind, it might help someone through their struggles.
Love,
it's okay team
